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Raising a blended family comes with many ups and downs. When parents get remarried it can be very confusing and frustrating for the children who get stuck in the middle. With patience and a positive attitude, you can achieve a blended family that is filled with love, respect, and peace.
Here are a few tips to successfully creating a blended family:
Be patient. Just because the parents are in love doesn’t mean the kids will automatically have the same feelings. Getting to know one another, and how to live happily under one roof takes lots of trial and error.
Make the children feel safe. Children want to feel stability. In a blended family they often feel uncertainty, mistrust, and fear. Reassure them that often, and don’t make them make many changes at once.
Don’t push them aside. The children are not in their honeymoon phase of love like you are. If you don’t show them love and attention like you do your partner they will feel like they are being pushed to the side and will take it out on the step-parent.
Don’t force the children. They will learn to play nicely, share, hug, and love each other on their own time, don’t force it.
Set the rules. This is not the time for the children to begin calling the shots. Set limits and boundaries, make sure the children know what is expected of them when it comes to behavior. It may be rough at first but the children will learn to respect the new authority.
Never make your child choose. Never make children choose between, or talk badly about, their “real” mom or dad.
A blended family can be a wonderful thing. Give it time, compassion, and consideration. You might find that your blended family is better than you could have ever imagined.
Visit our website for information on how we can help you make the process of blending a family as smooth as possible!
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